A little broken, a little wrecked, a little hated by a few at times, I enjoy. It is liberating and balancing.
I talked a lot. I am indebted to any chaos as it ends up imparting me pearls. And I realise, a talk is just a talk, mostly values not more than a noise. I am living the truth, would I care for the noise? Life is here with all its grace and hideousness. Noise is a lie. My life might shatter, just imagine for a second, and add more to the noise, still it affects nothing, affects none. Life grows then grows regardless of noises. Relations, life – everything about it can only be lived and not talked. Don’t live it and the relation is nowhere. It is just a name. When you live, you don’t demand, force or ask. No ugliness, but you have it.
No relation is founded on breaking others. It breaks itself then. Only relation that is based on creating troubles is ignominy, hatred. Ironically, it still has the same name. The excuse for not understanding, does help–in breaking it. It still has the same name.
And this noise adds to my amusement but I do nothing. Because, the mirror is capable of showing the viewer only, I am busy here with myself. But I do watch the chaos, someone posting Buddha quotes, someone another. Not for oneself but for others, as Buddha did! I observe the person in a hope of having a glimpse at Buddha, doing what Buddha did. All goes in vain, lies, what hasn’t been lived. I see efforts to hide this truth, hide that truth. Ah, adds more noise to the surrounding. Fear is all what I discover. But there’s nothing wrong with it, till you keep growing. I have been this wrecked too.
Truth radiates, it’s lived, experienced and felt. Moments when I conceived my baby, when I held her in my arms, when I fed my daughter from my breast, for the first time. And I watch her growing up everyday. In chopping vegetables, and reading books, the truth is being experienced.
The moment I found I am managing his or her opinion, talk, I quit. You don’t owe any explanation to the world about anything which doesn’t fall into your individual space. Any relation can not become the person but will stay as a relation.
Names of relation mean nothing till it isn’t lived. You cannot bring it to the stage and show it to the world what isn’t there. And the stage is not the place to live it for sure. Care and concern comes with understanding which is not possible without acceptance. When you accept, where’s the place for explanations? For no one in the world deserves to be treated as an object and possessed. It’s the care, that binds. Yet, it is freeing. And it will show up on the stage too.
We cannot imitate anyone else’s relation. We can have our own with everyone. Else, it will only be a competition then. Competition brings competitors and not friends or family. Competition too needs to be interesting and amusing enough to lure the competitors. So keeping it healthy, showing respect is the key.
And lastly, can noise bother me? Not a bit! Another realisation, noise or words are not the truth but their beauty is, I can beautify the surrounding, play with it. There’s much to learn, to excel, to grow a little better. Myriad of possibilities entice me.